The Friend I Aspire to Be

"A horse is like a best friend. They're always there to nuzzle you and make your life a better place." -- Anonymous

Yesterday I looked out the kitchen window and saw some serious horseplay going on in our neighbor's corral, so I grabbed my camera to get a few photos. As I watched the mare and gelding nuzzle and nibble each other, gallop and buck, I saw more than a couple of animals messing around. I saw two best friends sharing life.

The subject of friendship is often on my mind these days. One of our best friends has been diagnosed with an aggressive type of cancer. We're praying for a miracle. 

Henri J.M. Nouwen, in the The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey, writes of friendship:

"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."

Over the years, I've been blessed with friends like those Nouwen describes. Through their example I learned that our best friends are those who don't try to fix things when we're hurting. They simply come alongside us and share our pain. More and more, this is the friend I aspire to be.

"Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ."

Galatians 6:2

Nancy

Cleaning Buddy

Today is the kind of day that revs me up like a NASCAR driver at the Indy 500. The outside temperature is 54 degrees and the sky is partly cloudy. Aroma from a fresh-brewed cup of coffee is tickling my nostrils and I'm relaxing in front of the open french door. One of my favorite spots. Yup, it's what I call a French Door Day and I'm lovin' it.

I just finished a writing project that's had me glued to my computer for over a week. (No, not my book. That's still a work in progress.) In celebration of reaching my deadline, I went for a brisk walk on Riverwalk. I stopped along the way to breathe in the fresh mountain air and watch the rushing water, and that's when I noticed the debris. Little bits of styrofoam here, a takeout coffee cup lid there, a blue plastic bag hung up on a rock. All previously hidden under pristine, white patches of ice, but now as the cover receded in the warm air, quite visible in the river .

And that got me to thinking. How many of us have debris lurking in our lives that we never let anyone see? Unattractive stuff lodged under our squeaky clean exteriors that we'd love to tidy up?  

I've been blessed over the years to always have at least one friend that I could allow a peek at the junk in my life. That one non-judgmental person, besides my husband, with whom I'm free to be the real me. One woman who doesn't gasp when a piece of my life litter is revealed. I've got a couple of friends like that right now. I met with one of them over coffee this morning. We talked about the areas of our lives that need some work. Some debris that needs to be cleaned up. She encouraged me. I encouraged her. We'll check in with each other next Wednesday to see how we're doing with our cleanup projects. 

Do you have a cleaning buddy in your life? 

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. — Hebrews 10:24

Nancy

My Great Estate

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival."

— C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)

I've been thinking a lot about friends lately.  Friends are a huge blessing. Emily Dickinson said friends were her estate. I get that. My friends make me feel rich in ways that money never will. 

My best earthly friend is Dennis. There's no one I'd rather spend time with; no one I'd rather talk to. I believe everyone's best friend should be their spouse. I'll bet the rate of divorce would greatly decrease if that was the case.

This morning my best friend came back from Starbucks with a breakfast surprise. A slice of Reduced Fat Banana Chocolate Chip Coffee Cake, my favorite Starbucks treat. I appreciate the fact that it's reduced fat, but if it wasn't I'd eat it anyway, just because it's so darned good. And because it's chocolate. Chocolate and coffee belong together. End of discussion.

The red Starbucks cup is a Christmas gift from Dennis. (Yes, I make Starbucks coffee at home, but Dennis goes to Starbucks anyway. It's his social hour with his friends.) Our friend Keely -- the Starbucks barista -- wrote the girlfriend greeting on the sack before handing it to Dennis. It made me smile to see it. 

Jesus Christ had something very important to say about friendship. . .

"Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."
John 15:13

He also said. . .

"For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My life so that I may take it again. 

No one has taken it away from Me, but I lay it down on My own initiative. I have authority to lay it down, and I have authority to take it up again. This commandment I received from My Father."  John 10:17-18

For this reason Jesus is my Great Estate.